By Janett M. Blackman, herbalist-chef and medical missionary
If you are the one everybody calls, the church mother, the nurse, the daughter driving Mom to appointments, the friend who always shows up with a casserole, this is for you.
I spent more than 22 years caring for the sick at home. I learned that the caregiver is often the last person anyone checks on. And I learned something else: you cannot pour from an empty cup. Jesus Himself said, "Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28). Rest was His idea first.
Why caregivers stop caring for themselves
Most caregivers do not decide to neglect themselves. It happens slowly. Meals get skipped. Sleep gets shorter. Your own doctor appointments get pushed back. Before long, you are running on fumes and calling it faithfulness.
Taking care of yourself is not selfish. It is how you stay strong enough to keep loving the people God has put in your care.
Five small ways to care for the caregiver
1. Eat one real meal sitting down
Not standing at the counter. Not in the car. Once a day, sit down and eat a simple, colorful plate: vegetables, beans or lentils, whole grains, fruit. Plant-based meals do not have to be fancy to nourish you.
2. Drink water before coffee
Many busy women go hours without water. Keep a full glass by the sink and drink it first thing each morning.
3. Take a ten-minute "Sabbath moment"
You may not get a whole day off right now. But you can take ten minutes. Step outside. Sit in the sun. Pray. Sing. Do nothing useful at all. Put it on your calendar like any other appointment.
4. Let someone help
When someone says, "Let me know if you need anything," give them a real answer: "Could you sit with Mom on Thursday afternoon?" People want to help. Letting them is a gift to them too.
5. Protect your sleep
Sleep is where the body restores itself. A simple evening routine can help you wind down even on hard days. I wrote about seven of them here: 7 Gentle Evening Habits for Women Over 40 Who Can't Seem to Unwind.
A free gift for you
I made a one-page printable for women just like you. It has seven nights of gentle, plant-based evening habits and a rest scripture for each night.
👉 Get the Free 7-Night Wind-Down Guide
And if you would like simple recipes to nourish yourself in the evening and the morning, our book Restful Nights, Radiant Days: Niphals' Plant Recipes for Women was written with caregivers in mind. You can also find it on Amazon.
Common questions
Is self-care selfish for a Christian woman?
No. Scripture shows Jesus stepping away to rest and pray. Caring for the body God gave you helps you keep serving others well.
How can a busy caregiver find time to rest?
Start very small: ten minutes a day, scheduled like an appointment. Ask family or church members to cover one specific time slot each week.
What should a caregiver eat when there is no time to cook?
Keep simple plant foods ready: washed fruit, cut vegetables, cooked beans or lentils, and whole grains you can heat quickly. A cookbook with easy recipes can help you plan ahead.
This article is for general wellness education only and is not medical advice. If you are feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or unwell, please reach out to your doctor, and lean on your church and family for support.
